September 5, 2010

Older but wiser babies!

The birth of the first child is always such a memorable and joyous experience. Its the feeling that cant be erased over time. Its the memory and the moments that can be treasured and preserved in a special place for keeps.
Then with reality slowly sinking in, the new mother quickly realises without any prior warning the responsibility of it all . The hesitant but nervous mother entering new territory has to face the daunting task of burps and sobs. Its not rosy and by far smooth but its rewarding. Or thats what they keep reminding themselves with. Ahh the first toothless smile, the first step and the first hug. All worth it they say. But the first child is never the easiest. Accompanied with many trials and errors. The toothless smile comes only in their dreamy nights. The first step comes alongside a very bumpy road and the first hug comes after many colic relieving attempts.
Its the first for everyone. The parents and the child alike. Some love the journey and some love the process. Most parents usually exhausted with the processes involved fail to live the journey. Some juggle the process and their personal life well enough to be proud of their journey as parents.
The first child is always a testing period for everyone. Some reconsider the family expansion plans and others cant stop dreaming of their complete family picture. The first child has almost cemented its place as their one and only and then face the possibility of their world being rocked. This is the rebirth of the first child. The coming along of the second child always accelerates the growth and the maturity of the first child. The first has to now look the part of an older sibling without any training on an emotional or spiritual level. Parents quick to realise the impact of the second birth prepare and armour the child with the stability, confidence and the assurance that will probably stay with them throughout their lives. But its never too late to instill the values, love and patience. These tools of parenting that can be whipped out at any given time during the nursing and the training but they must never forget not to. Mothers are left with the daunting task of reliving the sea of sleepless nights and the rush of hormonal changes and the father with the solo task of the older sibling. This is the bond that we must nurture. The father and the older child. Many times I see the father lose himself further into his professional life and the mother caught between the insecure older child and the helpless younger newborn. But the father that takes this over and steps into bigger shoes will fill this void which will hold the child in good stead throughout their life.
The first child paves the way and given these two powerful tools are strong, dependable leaders. Younger siblings have many role models growing up but the one that stay with them and moulds and helps define their personality and character are the oldest first confident sibling.
The first of their strongest influencers.

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